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Are the Holidays Tough For You? A Heartfelt Guide for Those Who Struggle

As we step into the enchanting world of the holiday season, I want to take a moment to acknowledge that for some, this time of year isn't all twinkling lights and warm embraces. It's a sentiment that resonated deeply with me when a follower recently shared their own struggles during the festive season. It reminded me of a time, for a number of years, when I found myself treading a similar path. Tough for me, I can now say it was a temporary space. I would like to help you find this too. So, with the utmost care and understanding, this blog is dedicated to those who may be finding the holiday season a bit challenging. This one is for you or that special someone in your life that is stuggling.

Here are some ways to work through the tough:

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

In the gentle embrace of this blog, let's start by acknowledging that it's entirely okay not to feel the holiday cheer. Your emotions are valid, and this is a space where we recognize and accept the varied emotions that this time of year can bring. It's a reminder that you're not alone in your experience. Two things that help me is journaling and art. Where I can express and mind dump everything. It uncovers what is there, clears my mind and roots me.

2. Set Realistic Expectations:

Imagine a holiday season where you can breathe freely, unburdened by unrealistic expectations. Let's explore the idea of setting gentle, realistic expectations that prioritize your well-being over societal pressures. Let go of perfection and embrace a holiday experience that feels authentic and comforting to you. One thing to consider here is also communicating this to those close to you too. You can include them in making these changed expectations. You never know you may just be their inspiration to do what they too have been wanting to do for a long time.

Experiencing the Holiday Blues?

3. Reach Out for Support:

You don't have to navigate the challenges of the holiday season in solitude. I encourage you to reach out, to share your thoughts and feelings with friends, family, or professionals. Seeking support is an act of courage and self-love.

Here are some free supports that may be helpful for you. Also many employers now have what they call EAP (which some employers extend the support to family too). This is an Employee Assistance Program (seperate from paid benefits) which is also free and confidential. The other cost saving option is to look into any medical benefit plans that you may be a part of. Many times there is an amount allocated in paramedical coverage for therapy. For both EAP and benefit coverage talk to your manager or HR department. At the end of the day if need to pay for support please see it as an investment in yourself. I am not ashamed to say that I regularly have some sort of support that I am paying for, because damn it I'm worth it. The old me would have thought very differently. Your well-being is top priority. As your coach I am always her to help too.

4. Create Meaningful Traditions:

In this tender space, let's reimagine holiday traditions. Instead of feeling bound to expectations, explore simple yet profoundly meaningful activities that resonate with your heart. Let me repeat that last part . . that resonate with your heart. Whether it's a solo moment of reflection or an intimate gathering, create traditions that bring solace and joy. I recall someone sharing with me that every year they book a hotel in their favourite city for Christmas eve and Christmas day just for themselves. Be creative here. It could be to go howl at the stars, who cares. If it does not harm anyone and it brings you joy and maybe even laughter and tears that are releasing; than, you know what I say? Howl away!

5. Practice Self-Care:

Lastly, let's wrap ourselves in the comforting embrace of self-care. This is a gentle reminder to prioritize your well-being during the holidays. Explore nurturing practices – from quiet moments of reflection to small acts of kindness to yourself – that can bring a sense of peace and comfort. One way I do this is with meditation. Try out my FREE guided meditation which is only 4 minutes long called "Your Monthly Mindful Meditation: Deepen Your Connection and Inner" . If you like it, this is something that I do every month through my podcast. You can go back in listen to prior ones too. I have also been known make snow angels along my trail walks and enjoy a good cup of tea. My daughter dances her heart out in the privacy of her room. There are so many little things that you can test out and interchange but leave a big deposit into your emotional bank account.

My friend, as we conclude this heartfelt conversation, I want you to know that your feelings are seen and heard. If the holiday season feels like a tender spot, please know that you're not alone. With kindness and compassion, we can navigate this season together. By acknowledging your feelings, setting gentle expectations, seeking support, creating meaningful traditions, and practicing self-care. Let's pave a path towards moments of comfort and joy. You are cherished, and you are cared for. Are the holidays tough for you? Let me hold this space for you here.

Jess Fraser - Life and Transition Coach

Meet Jess Fraser, a vibrant Life Coach, retreat facilitator, podcast host, blogger, and avid book lover. With a passion for adventure, personal growth and transformation, Jess guides individuals on their journey towards self-discovery and empowerment. Her insightful writings and engaging podcasts inspire others to embrace change and embrace their true selves. If you enjoyed this article and would like to stay connected, join Jess at to explore her latest projects, including her empowering guided journal, "Courage to Change Journal." Together let's continue the journey of self-reflection, growth, and creating a life filled with courage and purpose.


Sharon Castle
Sharon Castle
Dec 14, 2023

I love this. Thank you for hearing me ❤️

Replying to

Always, appreciate the raw honestly and the bravery that comes along with that. Baby steps.

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